I was Asleep at the Wheel

My parents divorced when I was ten. My dad had full custody of my sister and me and we moved with him to Maine, away from my mom and memories growing up in Pennsylvania. We were not very religious, but my dad joined a Baptist church in Maine and so my sister and I became members, too. Around age thirteen or so I heard an invitation given and I went forward to pray with someone. I prayed a prayer and therefore thought that I must be “saved.” But I did not know what I did or really understood why.

My name is Matthew Cunningham, and this is my story.

Matts tract picAt age fifteen I moved from Maine to Pennsylvania to live with my mom. At that point I walked away from church and anything to do with God. That remained true for about ten years. I started a job after my junior year of high school working for my cousin, then got my CDL license and started driving a school bus.
Fast forward to around October 2015 and here I am at age twenty-five driving a tractor trailer truck to Ohio twice a week. One day, as I was driving along and flipping through the radio stations trying to find something “good” to listen to, I ended up tuning in a Christian radio station and I listened for a while. The next trip out, I turned it on again, until every trip to Ohio all I would listen to was Christian radio. After a few trips, I really felt that God was trying to get my attention.
Eventually I contacted a pastor I knew in Maine. I told him what was going on in my life and that I felt like God was seeking me out. I said, “Pastor, I don’t think I should ignore this.” He advised me that it would be wise not to. I asked him if he could help me somehow. He said yes and to give him a few days, he would get back to me.
I was sitting at home one Thursday evening and received a text from that pastor with contact information for Haven Baptist Church near me in Pennsylvania. After seeing this I went onto the internet to check them out. I brought up the church website and found their list of service times and I saw that they had a Thursday night prayer meeting. It was about 6:15PM when I was reading this and the service began at 7:00PM. I quickly got dressed and went to the service that very night.
Over the course of a couple months I attended almost every service. I really began to face the fact that I didn’t know if I was truly saved or not. Finally after trying to convince myself that everything was okay, I realized that wouldn’t be the case until I got right with God. On the evening of January 11th, 2016, I opened my Bible and began to read through parts of the Gospels and through First, Second and Third John. In all this, verses 13 and 14 of First John chapter 5 really spoke to me; “These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God. And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us.” The words “know” and “confidence” really stood out to me because I didn’t know and I wasn’t confident. Matthew 16:24 says; “Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.”
After reading all this and coming to the scary conclusion that I was not saved, I knelt beside my bed and prayed. I repented of my sin and asked the Lord Jesus to forgive me of my sin and come into my heart and life and be my personal Lord and Savior. I have chosen to deny myself and, with confidence in knowing, follow Jesus!
Second Peter 3:9 says; “The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance,” and in First John 5:14 the Bible tells us that; “…if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us.” Putting these two verses together we can see that it is God’s will for us all to come to repentance, therefore, we can know that God will hear us when we ask Him to save us from our sins. Like the blind man that Jesus saved in John chapter 9, I now know and can confidently say; “… one thing I know, that, whereas I was blind, now I see.” I am thankful that Jesus said what He did in Luke 19:10; “For the Son of man is come to seek and to save that which was lost.”